#redeterminator

(Continued)

Sergio: Hi, For me, reciprocity is the most important. And after it, love, loyalty, trust, honesty, value each other, respect. I think that with such qualities strong and reliable relations develop over many years. We have very strict anti-gay laws in Russia. Our power does not love us. She stops any attempts at open dating. Therefore, I decided to look for a partner for the future on the Internet. I was looking for information about gays from other countries. I found out that in your country, gays can build relationships. I found out about this site and immediately decided to register. Maybe I might like someone and in the future I will meet with him. I would like to leave one day in a free country, where they accept me for who I am. Where I can walk with my beloved man and hold hands.

ME: Interesting. Here in the free world we haven't ALL been that successful with internet dating. Perhaps, for some, sure maybe it's happened. In general though, we need a few better algorithms. As far as your lovely response... 

...I’m unsure of a few things. If you're saying without respect, one has nothing. This I agree. 

But for the rest, you’ll need to slow down a little bit––and think this out with me. First off, reciprocity, I would suspect not many here in the free world have a solid idea of the concept behind that word. So, I'm glad you've brought it up, though, as this too is also a core aspect influencing my deeply held beliefs (which even SCOTUS here in our great country has most recently given precedence to). My question to you Sergio is why does love need to follow reciprocity? My suspicion is, that it does not. While I believe it is very much true that the loyalty, honesty and value we place upon one another are the conditions from which reciprocity arises, when reciprocity, itself, is the thing valued most, above all else, especially in a relationship to the magnitude which you’ve described, then I believe the words of Jim Cunningham speak to us best:

"Son, it breaks my heart to say this, but I believe you are a very troubled and confused young man. I believe you are searching for the answers in all the wrong places."

Love; true love; which is available to anyone; at anytime––often sufferers greatly at the hands of reciprocity, that is when we expect ANYTHING from LOVE we will always be disappointed. Conversely, to BE loved, one may falsely assume that without continually laboring to gain affections of those we desire, that one is not deserving of LOVE. This idea, in and of itself, that we are not worthy of LOVE until we've paid-up—besides being dangerous––can lead to eery trappings which often seem quite advantageous, particularly when coupled with power. And money.

 

I hope you realize my words are not of some random salad I toss then set aside. These aspects turn within my soul daily, for I alone must confront my own demons holding myself accountable, first, as to what I proclaim as self-evident truth––then and only then can I truly share of myself in ALL aspects which love demands. Of these Love will never demand the reciprocity of LOVE––just as we, ourselves, are powerless of BEING loved. 

There is one last danger I would like to caution you of, Serg. One may actively rail against love, not ALLOWING themselves to be LOVED. This regretful yet unavoidable situation can occur for many reasons, known and unknown. Yet this becomes apparent, each time one disparages love, like say, two teens alone and watching a movie movie in an abandoned theater. They are fearful of love, because they feel unworthy of it. So this vulnerability they must ward off at any cost, and each time they see her or hear her spoken of, they degrade her with jokes, to allow themselves to cushion the blow of feeling loveless and unloved. And they will do this forever like ghost, until they are the last among our kind, and then kindness too is put out. Because without LOVE free, eternal, undeserving, unfixed, unplanned, unreasoned as large as the universe, and as small as the purest grain of sand, when the movie ends, there is only the end. 

THE END

Ps. I'm overjoyed to hear that you would hold hands with me in public, not every gay here is as open to PDoA. In fact, some of them (I won't mention names) in the past have expressed being down-right terrorized by my insistence upon such. I've always known Russian men, were real men. Thank you for bei   N.    N nnnnnng real.

  

bonus material:

Jane Says by Janes Addiction

lyrics by Perry Farrell

Jane says, "I'm done with Sergio"

He treats me like a ragdoll"

She hides the television

Says, "I don't owe him nothing, but if he comes back again

Tell him to wait right here for me or, 

Try again tomorrow I'm gonna kick tomorrow

I'm gonna kick tomorrow"

Jane says "have you seen my wig around"

"I feel naked without it"

She knows they all want her to go

That's okay man she don't like them anyway

Jane says, "I'm going away to Spain

When I get my money saved

I'm gonna start tomorrow

I'm gonna kick tomorrow

I'm gonna kick tomorrow"

She gets mad and she starts to cry

Takes a swing but she can't hit!

She don't mean to harm

She just don't know what else to do about it

Jane goes to the store at eight

She walks up on St. Andrews

She waits and gets her dinner there

She pulls her dinner from her pocket

Jane says, "I've never been in love"

No, she don't know what it is

She only knows if someone wants her

"I want 'em if they want me

I only know they want me"

Jane says... Jane says...